This Is Madness
by Fighter le Faye
Summary: -DISCONTINUED- Sephiroth & Angeal have had enough with Genesis's obsession with LOVELESS. The two make a plan to get rid of his copies and save their friend. OOCness. Pre-Crisis Core.
1. Chapter 1

**WARNING: This was a way random thing that popped in my head. You know that LOVELESS book that Genesis carries around and quotes with every other sentence? Yeah, read how Sephiroth and Angeal deal with it once and for all.**

**Well, cross out Angeal. He kinda snaps lol. Don't bite my head off if he and Sephiroth appear a little OOC. Sephiroth is the mastermind on "rescuing" Genesis, and it's a desperate mission. **

**Just for laughs at the three SOLIDER.**

* * *

"'My friend, your desire is the bringer of life, the gift of the goddess. Legend shall speak of sacrifice at world's end. The—'"

"_GENESIS!_ Shut up, will you!?" Angeal snarled, a vein appearing on his forehead. "Just stop it!!"

The 1st Class SOLIDER peered up innocently to his delirious friend through his bangs. Sephiroth raised his eyebrows at the usually calm Angeal.

"What's wrong?"

Angeal threw his hands up in the air, got up off the couch and turned around to Sephiroth standing nearby. The three were hanging out in the Shinra building in Lazard's empty office, waiting for their pay after a rather confusing but successful mission in Rocket Town (Don't ask. A drunken Cid was involved.) A few 3rd Class SOLIDER that had gone with them were in corner in the room, now staring at the three.

"You deal with it," he said to Sephiroth, who had a towel hanging down his shoulders.

Genesis frowned in thought as Sephiroth quietly muttered to Angeal, who suddenly yelled, "It's all the time, Sephiroth! Even since we've known each other. IT'S RIDICULOUS!"

The One-Winged Angel gripped him under the armpit and walked him out of earshot of the confused Genesis, who shrugged and went back to reading.

"Angeal, this isn't like you. Come on, you and I know he loves that play," Sephiroth urged softly. Angeal stared at him.

"He reads it to us every single fucking day."

"Oh, I've gotten used to it," Sephiroth shrugged his broad shoulders in the hope he'd calm down. Angeal frowned, rubbing his temples.

"That's the thing. I don't want to get used to it! I hear it all the time; in my sleep, in a battle, walking down the street, when I'm brushing my teeth—I can't take it anymore!!" Angeal had suddenly grabbed him and shook the great general like a maraca, making his long silver hair flutter around him. One of the SOLIDER in the background sighed dreamily.

Yes. Sephiroth has a few fanboys.

Sephiroth's eyes went wide in surprise. He spoke calmly, hoping Angeal wouldn't toss him out the window. And they were many stories above the ground.

"Really?"

"Yes," he sighed, relieved that he was starting to understand. Sephiroth frowned.

"We could burn it," he suggested, flicking his green eyes to the evil book that was taking over Genesis's mind. Angeal shook his head, taking a deep breath.

"No good. He has another copy in his apartment."

"Oh man." He rubbed the back of his neck. "Well…hm." Sephiroth thought a moment. "First, we get rid of this copy after we're done here," he said and pointed to the book Genesis was now flipping through, sitting back in the couch as he crossed his legs, completely oblivious to them.

"Okay, then?"

"We sneak in his apartment, and we'll deal with the last one. Trust me, I know what to do," he assured with a smile.

* * *

The two acted normal when they rejoined Genesis, laughing about the mission when Lazard came in and typed away at his computer, sending them to the floor below for their pay. At last, Genesis put his book up and talked more openly about the day. Angeal breathed more easily.

They continued making fun of Cid Highwind as they took the vacant stairs instead, avoiding any fangirls that'd try to molest them in the always packed elevator. Sephiroth shuddered at the dark memory. He and Genesis had to go to therapy once for it, a very uncomfortable experience since the therapist was a woman and a secret fan.

Oh, the joys of being a SOLIDER.

Once they each got a very nice check, they headed out the front doors of the building and saw it was almost sunset of the early summer and decided to go out to a good but casual Spanish restaurant. They went back to their places to get changed and met out in front.

Sephiroth arrived first, wearing dark blue jeans with dark shoes and a button-down black shirt with the top buttons unbuttoned and the sleeves rolled up the his elbows. A few necklaces, a long skinny chain belt and a woven bracelet on his right wrist completed the outfit.

He walked next to the window and folded his arms to wait, running the plan through his head, ignoring the women on the street staring longingly at him as they passed.

Genesis arrived next in less than a minute, waving his hands over his head with a carefree laugh with the setting sun behind him. Sephiroth sighed but smiled as he earned stares from more women, some whose boyfriends glared at him with envy.

His attire was similar to his. He had on loose jeans with a skinny chain belt, but wore flip-flops and a snug red polo shirt that did justice to his godly body, the buttons, of course, unbuttoned to expose the top of his perfectly sculpted chest. A couple of rings and bracelets adorned his arms, with his usual earring on. His Mako eyes were covered by broad square sunglasses with a brown tint. He looked like a super runway model.

"Hey," Genesis greeted with another laugh as he walked past a pair of teenage girls, who were practically drooling. He and Sephiroth bumped fists and turned back to the street.

"Get molested along the way?" Sephiroth whispered with a smirk. Genesis laughed quietly, pushing his bangs back.

"Not yet." They both laughed together and talked casually a few minutes under the burning, falling sun when Angeal walked up. He was wearing blue jeans and a black T-shirt with a light-weight jacket on, the collar popped up, and sighed heavily (a quote from the first act popped in his head) when he came up, taking off his black shades and putting them up.

Sephiroth was only doing this so Angeal would mellow out and cheer up (and a good dose of alcohol might help with that) for their mission. But it also coincided with their first task. Plus, he was in the mood for something good to eat.

As they walked in many turned around, jaws dropping as the sexy Sephiroth walked up to the front desk with the two impressive SOLIDERs with a small smile. A guy who was carrying two dishes gaped a second at them before walking on.

A tan woman with her black hair up in a bun was writing something down at the desk, rolling her tongue. When Genesis gave a soft cough, she flicked her brown eyes up.

"Oh."

"Hi," Genesis said in a sexy low tone and took off his sunglasses, his bright Mako eyes narrowed. "Do you have any tables available for a few weary SOLIDER?" He grinned softly.

She blushed with her mouth open slightly, speechless as she stared at his alluring eyes.

"Y-yeah," she chocked out and looked down. "Yeah, I can do that. One of our best tables is open. Is that okay?"

"Yup," Sephiroth said happily, reaching over to grip Angeal's shoulder, who was staring out the window, twitching as a quote of LOVELESS floated through his head. A surge of pity filled him. "We'll take it, ma'am."

"Alright, this way."

As they walked to a table outside on a large balcony with a perfect view, Angeal glanced at Genesis, who was effortlessly flirting with the blushing waitress (usually Sephiroth had to do it). He glanced back at Sephiroth, who had a spark of mischief in his eyes.

First task: Get Genesis drunk.

* * *

**Well? Review if you want to see how the plan fares. And yes, I said Spanish when there's no Spain in Gaia, but I wanted to let you know what they were going to eat.**

**Sephiroth: My plan will work. Genesis doesn't have a clue.**

**FF009: (turns around) Dude. (points to herself) MY plan. But I'll give it to you. This is the result of my boredom, my senioritis and my procrastination with not studying for exams. Now I'm going to stare at Genesis in his normal attire XD He is so **_**fine!**_

**Sephiroth: What about me?**


	2. The First Task

****

Glad y'all are curious. Thank you for the reviews!! The "mission" kicks to a start. Don't own game or characters (for now. I need to have a meeting with Nomura….XD joking! I wish.)

**Let the chaos begin!!**

* * *

"Whatcha gonna order, Seph?" Genesis asked and dipped a chip in the salsa, taking a bite. "Waiter's coming."

Sephiroth blinked a few times, who was putting his cell phone on silent mode, stopped his fingers. He looked up to see the sun had almost sunk into the horizon, stars scattered above their heads in the dark sky. Small cheerful lights were bright around the large balcony like fireflies with workers sweeping by with steaming dishes in between the tables of people chatting away, laughing bursting out every now and then.

At times, someone from a table would nod over to the SOLIDER's table and they'd fall into hushed gossip. The three didn't pay attention to it.

"What happened?"

"I was talking to you," his friend replied with a raised eyebrow, stuffing the rest of the chip in his mouth. "What's wrong with you? You're quieter than usual."

Angeal closed his menu and kept his eyes on it, listening intently while sipping on his drink. Sephiroth smiled confidently, leaning back into his chair.

"Nothing, I'm just starving so I might go overboard," he said, swiping his chip in the salsa so he couldn't continue. Genesis perked up, side-glancing at him, his emotion shielded behind his eyes. Sephiroth kept smiling, hoping he'd fall for a need to compete against him soon. Right now, he was just shaking the bait around in front of his face.

"Really?" he muttered, swirling a chip around in the salsa with a frown. Their waiter finally arrived at their table, pad and pen at the ready, flushing when the three looked up. They all gave their orders politely and were left to wait again.

"So Angeal, how's your student? I don't see you as much these days," Genesis commented, turning his attention to him. Sephiroth snuck his phone out under the table again, texting the black-haired man swiftly.

Angeal smiled, his eyes brightening with affection. "He's young and promising, but he has too much energy and not enough discipline. I swear the boy's going to give me gray hair soon from all the questions he asks."

Genesis smiled warmly, imagining a hyper mini image of Angeal running around.

"You seem to enjoy it," he said, eating more chips and salsa. Nodding, Angeal dug through his pocket for his vibrating phone, flipping it open to read Sephiroth's message:

_How many tequila shots can G take?_

Angeal frowned heavily with raised eyebrows, eyes on the phone in his lap. This was not going to end well tonight.

"Yeah, I'm also learning from him too…," he trailed off softly, punching in eleven quickly and looked back up with the frown still etched on him, not liking. "He's got the drive, like you."

As he said that Sephiroth smirked, holding down a laugh at Angeal's answer and replied back. Genesis rolled his eyes and slammed his hands on the table, making the silver-haired hero jump.

"What _are_ you two texting about!?" he demanded, staring the two down, a bit hurt at being left out. Sephiroth finally had his hands off his phone and Angeal was stoic

"…Well? What is it?" Genesis whispered uncomfortably, blinking from on to the other. Angeal stepped on Sephiroth's foot without warning, shooting him an urgent look. Sephiroth bit down on his tongue, eyes locked with Genesis's angry eyes.

"Here we go," the waiter announced as he stepped up with their food. Sephiroth gratefully watched him set down the dishes, instantly digging in. Genesis looked at him funny before shrugging and commenced to eating.

The meal went well, falling into normal conversation. Until Genesis and Sephiroth started to have their eating contest, finishing in a tie as Angeal just closed his eyes at their usual rivalry, eating at a normal pace. Before they could pounce on the waiter for a second course, Angeal asked for a check.

Genesis groaned, sinking back into his chair and rubbed his stomach when Angeal examined the amount due. Instantly he held out his hand for the other two. Sephiroth gave him a certain look but pulled out his wallet. The other SOLIDER did the same, giving his money before he could, which earned him a scowl.

"You want to call it a night?" Genesis asked, shades back on, picking up a toothpick and putting it to his teeth. "Any of you have missions tomorrow?"

"No, they wait when I'm ready," Sephiroth said honestly with a shrug. Genesis gave a "hmph," rolling his mako eyes.

"Just training exercises with Zack, nothing out of the city," Angeal said, pocketing the money in, putting a tip in. He stood up. "Let's see what we can find."

"Yeah," Sephiroth nodded. They exited as quietly as they could (one girl waved for them, and Sephiroth gave her a little nod, making the her faint) and roamed the streets, enjoying the peace of the night.

Angeal held a frown, hands in his pockets while his sunglasses hung on the collar of his shirt. They weren't roaming for the heck of it; Sephiroth was slyly searching for a bar. Hopefully, Gaia would hear the warrior's prayers and let it be one where no Turks were.

"Ah! Let's go here for a little while. People say it's one of the best," Sephiroth announced, nodding to a popular and packed bar/club down the busy block, where a line of people were waiting in front of burly guards. Genesis tilted his head to it, frowning at the building and whipped off his sunglasses.

"Never been here before. What drinks they got?" he muttered, putting his sunglasses up. Behind his oblivious back, Angeal had turned on his silver-haired friend, grabbing the top of his head so he had to look upon his scary and furious face.

"Ow! You've really been working out, Angeal. We should spar one-on-one again sometime…"

"You can't be serious, Seph. Why here?!" Angeal asked through clenched teeth.

"They have a lot of tequila here, and stop messing up my hair, man," Sephiroth said with a slight pout, roughly pushing Angeal's grasp off his silky hair. "This is the first task: Get G drunk. Only then we can move in on the targets."

"But…but!"

"….LOVELESS," Sephiroth whispered sinisterly, hands petting his hair into its normal place. Angeal shivered visibly.

"Hurry and do it," he begged, eye twitching at the quotes flying around his mind like…well, something annoying.

Sephiroth nodded, folding his arms just when Genesis turned around to them.

"Hello. What the hell is wrong with you two? Let's crash the scene," Genesis called to them, tapping his foot. Sephiroth elbowed Angeal once before walking up to him. He wrung his arm around his neck with a smile.

"Hey Genesis…"

"Hey, Sephiroth. What's with you?" Genesis shot right back with an unconvinced expression. "You're freaking me out." Angeal sighed, following after the two.

"Why don't we take tequila shots? See who has the higher tolerance…unless you're afraid, of course…" Sephiroth let his voice trail off when they reached the guards, who were bigger than them (but not as strong of course). Genesis's bright eyes went wide to his friend as he faced the guards so they could see his face. Angeal gave a nod to them while Sephiroth was smirking confidently, muscled arm still around Genesis's neck. People were staring at them, nudging each other over the three men ahead.

"You're on," Genesis whispered at last.

The grim guards were exchanging a look, and then stepped apart so they could pass. Sephiroth grinned, giving a nod of thanks and steered Genesis inside, Angeal passing by with more dignity.

* * *

Apparently, Gaia tossed Angeal's prayer over her shoulder or was on vacation.

When the three pushed up to the sleek, black bar through the packed dance floor, Angeal caught two Turks out of the corner of his eye. His stomach did a flip, seeing Reno and Rude at the edge, talking to someone.

Angeal turned his back on them after a while, seeing they hadn't noticed them, and chose to watch his friends, with salt on their wrists as they downed the tequila. And the slice of lime. His dark eyes roved to the glasses they have gone through—twelve each. He didn't even want to think about the bill.

Angeal rested his throbbing head in his hand, letting his focus take in his friends as a hip-hop song sounded pounded through the air. Sephiroth stood at ease, putting more salt on his wrist without any sign of wooziness as a bartender got ready the next round. He was even smiling wickedly. Genesis on the other hand was using the counter as a support, trying to steady himself with a slurred look in his eyes.

Oh, he was done for.

Angeal gave Sephiroth a look that told him to be merciful and just stop now. The One-Winged Angel responded by picking up the next glass.

"Come on, Genesis. Is that all you can take?" Sephiroth asked at the wait.

"Sephiroth, that's enough," Angeal said with sympathy for his very tipsy friend, who reached for the tequila and lime. "Genesis…"

It went unheard; the two did a last lick, sip and suck with the items. Sephiroth breathed out. Genesis didn't breathe at all (well, it looked like it from Angeal's point of view), only made a deep unintelligent slur and slumped forward, knocking his glasses away.

Sephiroth laughed, turning to Angeal. He quickly dropped the smile at his friend's disapproval.

"What? I still got it," Sephiroth said with no shame. Angeal sighed, but dropped the sternness, his lips quirking to a smile.

"Of course, great Sephiroth. No one can hope to surpass you," he said and swept into a dramatic bow. When he stood back up, he saw Sephiroth was laughing, tears in his eyes. He wiped at his eyes, grinning.

"All right. First task complete," he said, bending his head near Angeal's. "Now, we—"

"Let Genesis be kidnapped!!"

"What?" Sephiroth went with a raised eyebrow at his abrupt outburst. "That's not the plan, man." Angeal grabbed his shoulders and twirled him around, pointing at the empty stool where Genesis had been. Through his silver bangs, he couldn't make him out anywhere near them.

"Where the hell did he go?!" Sephiroth shouted, feeling a jolt of panic, heart racing.

"If I knew, do you think I'd be standing here, talking to your smart ass!?"

"My plan will still work! Just keep a level head. The second task shall be to recover Genesis."

"STOP PREACHING AND SEARCH!!" Angeal roared at the top of his lungs, slapping him hard upside the head. Sephiroth barely moved, growling darkly at him. He broke off, looking over Angeal's shoulder. Two women were carrying a body, squeezing through the dancing crowd and disappeared. The vivid red shirt of the victim rang bells in Sephiroth's head.

He pointed swiftly in that direction, hitting the side of Angeal's face.

"There he goes!! He's being kidnapped by his fan club!!"

"Which one!?" Angeal screamed, panic making his eyes wide.

"Shit, he has more than one!?" Sephiroth replied right back, instantly forgetting about the rescue. "That's so screwed up!"

"Focus!! You're a little tipsy!" Angeal shouted, seeing his friend lose his balance a split second. He pinched the bridge of his nose, breathing calmly at last. Angeal grabbed his arm, running out of the club, choosing to ignore the bartender yelling at them to pay their bill.

"Come on!"

Sephiroth let himself be dragged out, trying to not let the alcohol he consumed soften him up, mumbling something along the lines that only Angeal and he had one fan club, and how incredibly stupid Genesis was. A few cuss words spilled out.

Angeal just growled, pushing through the throngs of people, much of which decided to take the moment to gawk at Sephiroth being in close proximity with them.

After much pushing and shoving and cursing, Angeal flew out the exit. He stumbled to a stop in the middle of the deserted street, breathing deeply. His eyes flicked to the west, which led to the downtown area. He turned around to his comrade.

"What?" Sephiroth said, more in a whine than a question, holding the side of his head. His eyes lost focus for a second. "Stupid Genesis…"

Angeal slapped him on the head again, rolling his eyes.

"Let's go. We need to be quiet," Angeal ordered, pushing him forward from behind, hands getting tangled in his hair. "It should be easy to find them if we're quiet."

"Why is that light so bright?" Sephiroth whined in a slur instead, using a hand to shade his cyan eyes. "Stupid Genesis."

"I get it, man. He's stupid and a selfish brat. That's been established. But he also goes off into karaoke mode when he's drunk."

"Seriously?" Sephiroth asked more clearly. He went off into a long chuckle, clearly letting the alcohol take over.

"Yes. So we should hear them soon," Angeal said, shaking him aggressively to sober up. "Come on, Sephiroth. Don't give in."

"Mmm! No…I don't wanna," Sephiroth cried out like he was a child then grinned mischievously. "I want ice cream. It's so hot here…," he trailed off, starting to unbutton his shirt. Angeal managed to stop him at the last button.

"No! Don't make me punch you, man." Sephiroth was now reaching for his zipper to take off his jeans. Angeal shook him to a stop. "I said no! Remember what happened last time?"

"Noooo, stop it! It's so hot in here! Angeeeeeeaaal!" the hero whined and sat down on the street. He grabbed Angeal's arm with all his strength (somehow he didn't rip the arm off) and tried to pull him down. "Pleaseeee? I wanna have some ice cream!"

"Gaia save me, you're starting to lose it again," Angeal said, running a hand over his face. "And you're supposed to be the hero of us all. Genesis. Rescue. NOW!"

"No. He's a stupid jerk," Sephiroth pouted uncharacteristically, stubbornly folding his arms tight. "He has more fan clubs than ME! He can fall off a building for all I care."

"_**Sephiroth…I'm going to count to three…"**_

"Stupid, overly dramatic, prissy, mean, snobbish brat!! And with bad fashion taste," Sephiroth added and stuck his tongue out to where they were supposed to be running.

"THREE!!" Angeal screamed, punching him square in the face. Somehow, he didn't fall over. He cursed in pain, clutching his face. Shaking his head a few times, he glared up to Angeal.

"Why the hell did you punch me Angeal?" Sephiroth asked angrily, back to himself. Angeal pulled him up, a vein popping up on his forehead.

"You were drunk like that time at my birthday last year!"

"No!" Sephiroth gasped in horror, whipping his head around.

"Uh…yeah."

"Wow. I'm sorry," he said, running a hand through his hair. "Wait! Genesis—"

"Is still being kidnapped," Angeal answered bluntly.

"Then let's go!"

The two sprinted down the street to complete their second task:

Rescue Genesis from his fan girls.

Oh yeah. It was going to be a looong night.

* * *

**ROFL! I have no idea how Sephiroth is when he's drunk, since it seems unlikely he would be. **

**Whatever. I couldn't let this opportunity pass. I bet the Sephy fan girls were almost having nosebleeds when he was trying to strip XD Poor drunk Sephiroth is so misunderstood. Well, hope you like it. And the night is young for our heroes. The second task is next! And a drunk, kidnapped Genesis! **

**What more could you want?**


	3. The Second Task

**(Zack walks up and reads from a card)**

**Zack: FaerieFighter009 does not own Final Fantasy VII or its characters but owns this story. She apologizes for updating late. She thanks MysticSpiritus for giving her a couple song ideas and Final Hikari who helped with some lyrics and the fan girls and other stuff. Give the two a hug. What?! (looks down to authoress)**

**FF009:** …**what? We'll handle that later.**

**Zack: And she thanks everyone who reviewed! The songs and products mentioned belong to their respected owners. Also no disrespect to Gackt...Can I have my cookie now?**

**FF009: Jeez, fine. (throws a cookie) Now get lost. Seriously (Zack happily walks away) I warn you, this is a REALLY weird chapter. But hey, look at the title of the story; that's warning enough. Do enjoy though.**

* * *

Scuffling, a curse, and heavy breathing reached Genesis's ears. He just breached into consciousness, keeping his eyes closed. He felt weird from getting drunk, not to mention the killer migraine he had.

Last time he'd do all that tequila. Stupid Sephiroth.

And uncomfortable. Why was he being held when he did not want to be held?

"Be careful! Don't let his flip-flops fall off!" a girl's voice snapped. "We could sell that for Red Leather."

"You be careful and not mess up his sexy hair, Leigh! Keep going and let's get him in," another girl hissed back and they continued to move. "Wonder if we'll get promoted or something…I mean, we did capture him."

Leigh laughed through her heavy breathing. "We'll be the leaders now, Katy. Let's lock him in the isolated room with my key, and then we'll get Red Leather."

"Sweet."

On second thought, he prayed he would lose conscious.

**THE SECOND TASK**

Sephiroth (still distraught he had a drunk episode) and Angeal (fed up with the plan and Sephiroth already) were running through downtown. Well, they were running through a busy place in Midgar. Our two heroes were desperately searching for a sign of Genesis.

And I mean desperately.

"Genesis?" Sephiroth asked, lifting the lid of a trash can.

"Genesis?" Angeal went, peeking under a rock on the ground.

"Genesis!" Sephiroth yelled out with cupped hands, using his black wing to fly up to the top of a building.

"GENESIS!" Angeal yelled so loudly, flying higher. Sephiroth stared up at him, wondering if he took a few drinks when he wasn't looking. Angeal sighed, hovering down to him.

"Okay, we can figure this out. They're fan girls. We're SOLIDER First Class. Big difference," he said, folding his arms. Sephiroth hung his head, moodily staring at the streets below. "Which club would take him: Red Leather or Study Group?" He stared at below for a few seconds. As one, the two snapped their heads up.

"Red Leather!!" they cried in union.

"Oh this is bad," Angeal continued, running a hand through his hair. Sephiroth searched around before beckoning him to follow. He dove against the wind, his icy green eyes roving around carefully.

"Hey!"

Sephiroth glanced behind with surprise, feeling Angeal grab his arm hard and let himself be dragged off to the top of another building. Sephiroth touched down on the edge while Angeal remained airborne.

"Do you know where to go?" Angeal asked, watching him warily.

"Well, I've heard rumors on where they could be from some of the men, so it's best to start there," Sephiroth said with a shrug. Angeal nodded, then squinted at him.

"Are you sure you're all right?"

"What do you mean?"

"You were just drunk moments ago," Angeal said, looking at him with worry. Sephiroth blinked a few times, looking down at his hands. "I mean, you should at least have a hangover right now."

"I think you punched it out of me when you hit me," Sephiroth whispered up to him with a frown, folding his arms.

"Well I had to do something. You were about to strip in the middle of the streets—Hey! Put the Masamune up!" Angeal yelled, flying above Sephiroth's range of vicious swipes. "At least I stopped you in time. And you two say _I_ need to get laid."

"Shut up Angeal. The mission is still on," Sephiroth growled darkly, swinging his long sword around so it rested behind his neck and on his shoulder, stalking away from his "friend." Until he blindly walked off the edge of the building.

You read that right. The great general Sephiroth just walked off a building, completely forgetting the ability of the damn big wing he has stuck in the right shoulder blade.

"AW SHI—" Sephiroth's voice was cut off in the roaring rips of the wind. Angeal gasped in shock.

"Sephiroth!!"

He dove down as fast as he could and grabbed Sephiroth under the arms, letting out a huge sigh. The sword bounced out of his grip. With a cry, Sephiroth used the tip of his toes to kick it back up in his grasp. He let out a huge breath, blowing his bangs out of his eyes.

"I…think I'm having a…delayed reaction to the hangover," the silver-haired man muttered with a hint of embarrassment. "Or something."

"It's crazy enough to believe," Angeal snorted, carefully floating down to a dark alley. He dropped Sephiroth on his feet, who slowly sat on the ground while hanging his head, before touching down neatly. "You want to sit a minute?"

"Damn," Sephiroth cursed, cradling his throbbing head between his hands, not able to hear him. "All that mako I have pumped in me must be messing me up…"

Angeal folded his arms in solemn wait. His eyes flicked in focus when something dashed past the shadowy fork in the alley up ahead. He frowned in thought, hearing hushed words and giggles.

"Hm?"

All of a sudden, another figure dashed by. Angeal knelt down in front of Sephiroth, keeping most of his body hidden behind the ladder of a fire escape. It was a smart move because a large group of people were following after the figure, all whispering excitedly.

"What the…" Angeal whispered to himself, wondering why a group of women would be wondering around dangerous alleys.

"Hey, hey, no pushing ahead of me! Only a few at a time can see him."

"Hurry them up, Leigh. Before Genesis wakes up; who knows how he'll be when he wakes up."

A light bulb flashed in Angeal's mind. He gripped down on his raised knee, mentally shouting at them to hurry.

"Okay, this way. Hurry!"

In frenzied steps, the group trailed down the path to the right. Waiting until he couldn't hear them any longer, Angeal turned around to his partner, who was starting to come to.

"Seph! They have him. Somewhere up ahead."

"What?"

"I just heard them. Red Leather. And they left, just now!" Angeal hissed. Sephiroth sprang up and finally buttoned up his shirt, completely serious.

"Oh no," Sephiroth whispered, shaking his head out a few times to get his over his hangover. He looked back up with clear eyes. "What's the plan?"

"We crash the party and save him! Though we have to try not to use force, or else it'll look like assault or something."

"We better hurry."

Angeal nodded and stood, leading the way.

**SOMEWHERE ELSE…**

Far away, at where Genesis was being kidnapped, the fan girls were all frozen in shock at what they were witnessing. Leigh and Katy at the forefront of the group, mouths open at what they found when they opened up the room.

Mr. Rhapsodos was staggering around in a drunken state, singing to himself. And in another language. And very drunk.

"…_kimi no hitomi ni utsutteiru no ha boku ja nai n da ne…"_

"What—"

"—The—"

"—Hell?" Three fan girls had spat out at random, unable to believe such a great voice came out of their worshipped man. A random small girl had fainted behind the two ringleaders; no one noticed. Leigh was beat red while Katy had whipped out her handy dandy cell phone, filming the wonderful, wonderful event.

"He…he sounds like that guy! What's his face?" A girl turned to her comrades. One girl was drooling with a glaze in her eyes. "You know that creepy singer who keeps trying to look like him…"

"Two of you go keep watch," Katy ordered. A couple of the older girls ran off, eyes on the SOLIDER as few girls pushed forward for a closer look.

"…_utsumuku…"_ Genesis staggered to his left, almost falling. "…_kimi ni…nani mo…"_ Genesis spun around, closing his eyes before tipping over backward. Leigh recovered herself, dashing forward and caught him in mid-fall from behind. Unfortunately, Genesis was a bit heavy so Leigh fell back on her butt from the force.

The girls gasped as one! A car zoomed by in the streets!

"Say something!" Katy gasped.

"I'm okay," Leigh said when she caught her breath, uncomfortable at how her legs were twisted. Genesis had his eyes closed, breathing deeply.

"Not you, Genesis!"

"…right," Leigh said, raising an eyebrow. "Can you help me?"

Katy sighed with frustration, stopping her film production and walked over, pulling Genesis up while Leigh pushed up. No luck.

The rest of the fan girls were still struck dumb at how close they were to him; some had took their phones out to film the supposedly sleeping Genesis for Red Leather; another fan girl had passed out. That also went unnoticed.

"My gosh, you girls are so weak!" Leigh shouted to Red Leather before growling at the trap she was in. "Stop letting your hormones make you pass out and make yourself useful!"

"We can have sex with him?!" many girls squealed.

"NO!!" Leigh and Katy shouted ferociously, still trying to get Genesis up with no avail.

"Worth a shot…" a girl mumbled, kicking a rock on the ground.

Katy growled, flipping her hair back when quiet laughing sounded out. Leigh blinked her bright eyes with a blush, feeling Genesis's body shake with the laughs. Katy blinked back before staring down at him.

"Still drunk?" Leigh whispered.

"Yup," Katy nodded. With a final try, they got Genesis up on his unsteady feet, who kept chuckling like a drunken fool. Katy raised an eyebrow while Leigh picked herself up, grumbling all the way. When she brushed her hair back and saw Genesis, her eyes went wide.

He took a step before back stepping, bobbing his head to a beat only he heard, mumbling another song softly.

"Can we touch him?!" an insane girl shouted.

"Can we strip him!?" screamed a psychotic young man. Katy twitched a few times with Leigh. Since when did that happen??

"What's he doing?" a girl called out while he kept stumbling around, keeping close.

"Uh…breathing?" Leigh said back with a shrug. Genesis turned around to the group at last, giving a very nice pelvic thrust and started to sing louder.

That caused ten girls to faint on the spot.

Katy and Leigh jumped back, quite shocked at this sudden happy state.

"_This club has got to be the most pretentious thing,"_ Genesis sang out fluidly, moving his body around just enough. "_Since I thought you and me…"_

"No way!!" the psychotic man (still conscious) screamed out. They all rushed closer for a better look.

"_Well I am imagining…a dark lit place,"_ Genesis sang on, "_Or your place or my place."_

Katy's mouth was open wide. Leigh was holding onto her arm, both blushing to the roots.

"_Well I'm not paralyzed but I seem to be struck by you," _Genesis burst out, grabbing a random fan girl and twirled her around before letting her stumble away. "_I want to make you move because you're standing still. If your body matches what you eyes can do, you'll probably move right through me on my way to you!"_

One girl was having a nose bled at it all, her desires fulfilled when she locked eyes with Genesis briefly.

Outside, at the edge of this chaos, our two heroes FINALLY arrived! The two girls acting as guards stopped them, stepping forward with folded arms. Angeal stumbled to stop while Sephiroth smoothly walked up, holding his sword out at ease. He looked down on them with a grim expression.

"Move," he ordered.

"No," they responded together.

"Well that was easy," Angeal mumbled, rolling his eyes. Sephiroth started to have a staring contest with the one of the right when Angeal suddenly perked up, hearing familiar singing. The other girl gulped, giving a forced smile. That didn't work.

"Get out of my way," Sephiroth warned, gripping the hilt of his sword tighter.

"You can't!" one suddenly shouted, holding a hand out.

"Give me a _very_ good reason, or I'm forcing myself in," Sephiroth threatened very darkly. The girl bit her lip in fear, so her friend took over.

"You have to tell us…something," she said bravely, nodding off. The singing had stopped all of a sudden. Well, that could not be anything good. Sephiroth glanced over to his comrade desperately.

"Like?" Angeal sighed.

"What's his favorite color?"

"Red obviously."

"Do you have access to his wardrobe?"

"What?!"

"Do you have pictures of him when he was little?"

"This is ridiculous!" Sephiroth exclaimed, eyes glowing with anger.

"Do you know his parents?"

"Well…yeah, I grew up with him," Angeal kept answering, sweat dropping.

"Angeal…"

"Does he have a stuff animal from his childhood still?"

"That's it!"

Sephiroth walked to them, easily pushing them to the side so they could walk through. "Come on Angeal!" he demanded, yanking him by the arm. They sprinted away easily, bursting into the room where Genesis was being contained.

It was surprisingly easy to get through since many were unconscious, but some of the women (and one man…) were staring ahead in shock their friend. Two girls nearest to him were sitting on the ground back to back, completely wiped out. Their eyes went past to them to Genesis. Their eyes almost popped out at the very awkward situation. Leigh turned to them when they froze.

"We give up. We can't make him stop. Please...can you take Jenny off our hands...he's crazy when he's drunk..." she gasped, wiping her forehead. Katy nodded. Genesis, sniffing with tears rolling down his face, crawled over to Sephiroth and Angeal when he saw them. He grabbed each of their legs with full strength, making the two stumble forward, and kept crying. Sephiroth turned to Angeal for help, stunned numb at the change.

"Yeah, um…sometimes, when he's drunk, after singing…he gets REALLY sad and just starts bawling…" Angeal whispered as Genesis kept crying. Sephiroth started to get a very painful headache.

"…Angeal…you know you could have said that earlier in time."

"Sorry. I was panicking a lot."

Sephiroth groaned loudly, rubbing his temple with one hand. "I thought I was strange when I was drunk. But Genesis wins hands down..." Genesis looked up with big sad eyes.

"Sephiroth, Angeal. I have a confession to make," he cried, looking very sorrowful. Sephiroth looked down on him with a severe frown. "Seph…you know that time, when you woke up and found a chunk of your hair cut off…and I told you it was Angeal. Yeah, it was me."

"_**What?!"**_

"I _knew_ it," Angeal whispered sharply, not seeing smoke rising from the angry general's body, a trick no one knew he could do. Maybe it was just the mako and Jenova cells reacting in weird ways at the situation. Who knows?

Angeal ran a hand over his face and through his hair when Genesis let out a couple of tears. "Genesis?"

"Yeah?" he sniffed.

"You want us to take you home?"

"Yeah," he cried out quietly, rubbing his eyes. Sephiroth stopped smoking and stared with wide eyes as Angeal pulled Genesis up.

"That's it?" Sephiroth whispered so quietly as if a bomb was about to go off, eyes darting from one to the other. Angeal shrugged, throwing Genesis's other arm over his shoulders.

"This will work out for us, right? I mean, once he passes out at home, it'll be easy to get the LOVELESS books," Angeal whispered. Sephiroth raised his eyebrows as they treaded out into the city.

"That's--You're right, Angeal! All right, the third task: Locate Genesis's LOVELESS copies!"

* * *

**That was the weirdest thing I've written yet. Cool. **

**Heh heh, Gackt, if you happen to be reading this…don't kill me. **

**We're back on track with the mission folks!! The next task will be getting into Genesis's apartment and finding his LOVELESS copies, and a surprise guest appears to help out! Hopefully the land lord won't wake up. **

**How many copies? Oh who knows…**


	4. The Third Task

**FORGIVE ME!! GOMENASAIIII!! (throws plushies and cookies at everyone, accidently knocking out a random reader with a cookie) ****I'm SOO sorry it's been a while, but life got really insane for me; just started college. Plus I got a huge writer's block. And other stuff. I'm sorry! ****I REALLY hope people still want to read this, so please review so I know you're still reading this. I need motivation. _VINCENT DO YOUR THING!_**

**Vincent: ...(looks at readers) Oh, right. FaerieFighter009 doesn't own game or characters, thankfully, or the show 'Friends.' Can I go now?**

**FF009: If you've watched the show you might catch the thing I borrow. Sorry, I needed some inspiration to go on. Enjoy please.**

* * *

**THE THIRD TASK**

Our two heroes were carrying Genesis back to his apartment.

Until Sephiroth tripped on a rock and their friend fell smack down on his face, causing Angeal to hit Sephiroth in turn for being so out of character, who was laughing evilly at Genesis's hangover. He was still mad at his friend for having more fan clubs than him.

So they ended up flying instead of walking, Genesis grumbling a slur of rather colorful curses at his silver-haired friend all the way. Least there was no air traffic from fan girls and all. And that one fan boy of Genesis's.

That made them shudder at the mere thought.

"Let's never talk about that again," Angeal muttered through the winds, eye twitching. Everyone nodded in agreement. Genesis groaned, so that counted as a yes.

In a few minutes they slowly, carefully descended to Genesis's apartment, entering as silent as shadows. They slipped through the halls and used the stairs (Sephiroth and Genesis still had that phobia for elevators from those fan girls.) But this was a hassle, walking up the steps and carrying Genesis at the same time (who was now sound asleep from his 'tiring' ordeal). After much cursing, furious whispering and one wacked-out use of a Thunder spell (which sent the whole building into a black out; Sephiroth growled darkly at Angeal) they finally got into the dark hall that contained Genesis's door at the end.

Dark hallways are always a bad sign.

"Dark hallways are always a bad sign," Angeal whispered with a shiver, shifting Genesis's arm around his shoulders more comfortably. Green eyes darted over to him. "Don't you watch horror movies?"

"Real life Angeal," he stated as if it were the most obvious thing then pointed to his forehead. "Got it memorized?"

Angeal raised a dark eyebrow, seriously concerned for his friend's mental health. "...Stay away from the alcohol, man."

Sephiroth sighed, rolling his eyes. He walked away (so now all of Genesis's weight was supportive of Angeal) looking side to the side every now and then until stepping up in front of Genesis's door. He looked up at it as Angeal decided to follow.

"Should I just push the door down?" he asked, blinking at the obstacle. His friend (the conscious one) gave him his trademark disapproving look.

"No, his alarms will go off, thinking we're stalkers," he said, realizing how heavy his friend was. "He's bound to have a key somewhere."

Sephiroth turned around, giving him an odd look.

"Where...?"

"In his pock...et...OH!" Angeal gasped with wide eyes, realization sinking in the pit of his stomach.

"Which pocket?" Sephiroth continued, looking even more afraid. Angeal shook his head.

"The back pocket...yeah, I'm not checking. I'm carrying him. You check. You've made this night more of a stressful mission than it needs to be."

"Well I'm not going to check, I'll look like a molester."

"Oh Gaia, save us."

"DANGER!!"

Angeal and Sephiroth screamed at the top of their lungs, jumping back in fright with their hearts racing at the speed of light. In all the chaos Genesis was carelessly forgotten and dropped onto the floor. He simply snored as his two friends, who were clutching their hearts. Sephiroth looked very harrassed as someone started to laugh.

Angeal blinked and breathed out, recognizing that laugh all too well. A small figure stepped closer, grinning at his successful scare.

"Zack?!" Angeal cried in outrage. Sephiroth's eyes widened, seeing a young teenage boy with spiky-black hair (oh Sephiroth hated spiky hair now) step up. "What was that?"

"What are you?" Sephiroth asked in turn, eyes dilated at Zack.

"A lesson, in the art of...unagi," Zack answered, pointing two fingers to his forehead, determined to be strong in the general's prescence. Sephiroth's hand dropped at what he said, unable to believe this strange person was Angeal's, the strict and responsible one, student. What a strange way of meeting him.

"Isn't that a type of sushi?" he breathed out at last, still staring at Zack like he was a psychotic freak. The boy blinked his round blue eyes then grinned, rubbing the back of his head.

"Yeah--I mean, no! This is something I read about! It's a tactic of surprise," Zack urged with a bit of stubborness, looking very serious with those words. Sephiroth raised an eyebrow, seriously troubled. Angeal blinked twice.

"I didn't know you could read..."

Zack blushed and dropped his hand as Angeal ran a hand over his face.

"I don't think you read that right," Sephiroth snorted with a scowl.

"What am I going to do with you?" Angeal groaned. Zack took a step forward.

"But--"

"No."

"Angeal!"

"No."

"I--"

"NO. Zack. no," Angeal said severely, shaking his head.

"What are you doing here anyway?" Sephiroth said, folding his arms. Zack smiled, reaching into his pocket.

"To help you!" He pulled out a shiny silver key, getting their full attention. Angeal recovered and lightly picked it out of Zack's grasp, who was smiling very happily.

"So I can help you?" Zack asked in a cute plee. Angeal frowned in thought, Sephiroth shaking his head behind him going unnoticed. Zack gave his mentor the big sad puppy dog eyes, his lip trembling.

Angeal sighed.

"Okay."

"Awesome! Thank you, Angeal!" Zack cheered, pumping a fist in the air as Sephiroth's hand twitched involuntarily a few times. Angeal smiled, giving Zack the key before he went to the door, standing behing his student as he unlocked the door. "There!"

"Have you lost it?" Sephiroth snarled, wrenching his brainwashed friend back as little Zack walked in the apartment, peacefully humming a song. Angeal frowned and wrenched his arm back.

"Come on already. He wants to help. Zack's a good kid."

Sephiroth groaned and reluctantly followed, pretty sure Zack wasn't. He walked down the hall and went to the first door on the right, which happened to be much like a living room. Zack was standing in the center looking very happy as Angeal walked up, pocketing his hands in his jacket. Sephiroth sighed.

"So where should we start looking?" Zack asked, eyes bright as stars. Sephiroth had to wonder how Angeal survived teaching this crazed kid. And why he would ever give him sharp objects. Like a sword, for example.

"Where would you put something you practically worshipped?" Angeal said to his two partners in this important mission. The answers he got weren't the most helpful.

"Bathroom cabinet."

"Fridge."

"...Guys...we're talking about a play, not hair products or food," Angeal hissed with a fiery blaze in his eyes. The other SOLDIER folded his arms, sighing off. He stared at the clock for almost a minute then blinked, his Mako eyes wide as saucers.

"Are we forgetting something?" he asked, his voice almost cracking in horror.

"No, why?" Angeal said warily, digging through the papers and magazines on the coffee table for that cursed play.

Slowly they stared at each other. Zack jumped suddenly, hands on his head.

"Where's Genesis?!"

* * *

So, after throwing many, many Ice spells at each other while insulting one another, turning Zack into a popsicle and THEN after more bickering, used a Fire spell to melt Zack back (though Sephiroth really didn't want to) the SOLDIERs ran out of the apartment and banged the door open in a thunderous slam.

As one they focused their bewildered gazes down to the ground.

"Mm...giant cheesecake," Genesis muttered with a smile in his happy dreams, kicking his leg out like a dog running in his sleep. The two blinked in outstanding surprise.

"Genesis talks in his sleep," Angeal gasped in shock.

"Genesis has cheesecake," Sephiroth said in awe. Before Angeal could say anything he simply turned around and went back inside.

"I'll never understand him," Angeal said under his breath, scooping up Genesis. He swept inside and kicked the door close, stolling into the living room to drop off the unconscious man. He looked around, seeing Zack searching diligently for the play.

"Found anything?"

"No, nothing in here," Zack answered with a frown, stetching up. "We should search another room."

Angeal folded his arms.

"Where's Sephiroth?"

"I dunno," Zack shrugged. "He was searching for the kitchen, when we should be looking for the play..." He paused, turning fully to his mentor. "Why is he in the kitchen? Would Genesis leave it there, maybe?"

"Wait here," Angeal ordered, feeling a pounding in his temples. "And keep an eye on Genesis."

Angeal swiftly departed for the kitchen, not noticing Zack staring in concentration at the sleeping First Class, taking the mission very seriously. Angeal slid to a stop at the doorway, examining the area. It was squeaky clean, vast and modern. And the refridgerator door was open.

Weird.

Silently Angeal tip-toped around the counter. What he saw made his eyes dilate in surprise.

"Sephiroth?!"

The plate the general was holding was thrown in the air, not expecting a shout out of nowhere. The food that was occupying the plate swished through the air until it landed in a plain smack on the clean floor, right after the shattering of the dish.

Sephiroth hands were still held out in front of him, as if still holding it, a blank look in his rich eyes. Angeal squinted one eye, mouth open at the fiasco he just caused. Loud footsteps carried to the doorway behind his back.

"What happened?!" Zack asked in a panic.

"Um, nothing. Just searching still," Angeal stammered, glancing over his shoulders. He gave him a stern look. "Come back when Genesis wakes up."

Zack nodded readily and ran back to the living. Awkwardly Angeal turned around and held on the table for support, watching his friend, still quietly distress.

"...Sephiroth?"

"Mm-hm?"

"...What were you doing?" Angeal forced out polietely, baffled beyond anything that had happened tonight. Leaning on the counter Sephiroth kept his gaze down at the half-eaten cheesecake now demolished in soggy pieces at his feet. Angeal blinked a few times before kneeling to the floor to pick up the shards.

Slowly Sephiroth pulled the fork out of his mouth, chewing silently what was still in his mouth. Angeal couldn't remove the shock from his face, never knowing his friend had this craving until now. Or why he did. Sephiroth slouched his shoulders, the usual cold gleam in his eyes melting away.

"I always liked cake when I was a child," he said sadly. Angeal looked up from his clean up, even more surprised. He was rubbing a finger in one of his raised knees, not looking up. Angeal plucked up another piece, averting his gaze down. "The company won't let us include it in our diets anymore."

He lowered his green eyes, simply looking very down in the dumps. Angeal loosened the tension in his shoulders, never knowing his friend's secret for sweets.

"I...didn't know," Angeal finally mumbled. Sephiroth said nothing. He rubbed the side of his neck. "Sorry Sephiroth."

He gave a tiny shrug, still rubbing his knee.

Angeal gather the last of the pieces, walking away to dump them in the trashcan before returning.

"Well, then do what you want."

"But..."

"So? They need you more than you need them." He smirked warmly. "Right?"

Sephiroth lifted his gaze, strands of silver falling over them. After a while his lips quirked into a smile.

"Thanks Angeal."

Angeal shrugged as Sephiroth stood up, brushing himself off. When he looked up Angeal was searching around, walking into the hall. Brushing his mouth off with the back of his hand he followed.

"Now what?"

"Let's check his bedroom. It's the most likely place where he keeps LOVELESS," Angeal whispered, leading the way down the dark hall. The floor didn't even creak as they treaded over it. Angeal opened the door at the end. "This is it."

Sephiroth looked over Angeal's shoulder. A dark king-sized bed rested on the opposite wall. All the lights were off, making it hard to see how Genesis kept his room. The dark-haired man clunked his boots through, slightly crouched for anything that might pounce at them. He only took a few steps when Sephiroth flipped the lights on, making him freeze and squeeze his eyes shut at the abrupt change.

"Lights are back on," Sephiroth announced after the delay. And then something meowed, and Angeal was pretty confident it wasn't his friend.

He opened his eyes, looking around until he saw a fluffly ball of fur that was a cat sitting on Genesis' bed. It was a calico, soft patches of black, white and orange fluffy and thick, its light green eyes sleepily watching them. A quiet purring could barely be heard, but its tail was swinging around.

Not good: Sephiroth and Angeal were not cat people.

Gulping Angeal kept himself turned to Genesis' cat. Sephiroth side-stepped to him, doing the same with narrowed eyes. The cat merely closed her eyes, purring and thumping her tail once before standing up.

Angeal grapped Sephiroth's arm, side-stepping quickly while reaching his other hand out for a door, watching the cat slowly step toward the edge of the bed. He found a slippery knob and gratefully pulled it open before staggering in it, both breathing loudly.

Sephiroth passed a hand over his eyes.

"I hate cats," he muttered, shaking his head.

"Sephiroth?"

"Yeah?"

"This is not a normal closet."

Sephiroth lowered his hand, squinting ahead to see his friend staring ahead with a dumb, bewildered expression, shoulders slouched down. Knowing he shouldn't Sephiroth roved his gaze to where his were staring.

His jaw dropped.

"What the--"

* * *

**Oh dear, I bet that was crappy. I'm sorry. Review if you want more or are still reading. (looking around the deserted area as a tumbleweed goes by) I'm a horrible authoress! (hangs head in shame) ****But yay we got Zack! The unagi thing came from a really funny episode of Friends. Part of it's on YouTube :) ****And yes, Sephiroth loves cake. I don't know why. One day I had a dream he was sneaking cake from my kitchen o.O He didn't like me, but he really liked the cake...**

**Anyway, can't say how soon I can update, got a lot else to write and it's late too. Hopefully it won't be months till the next update. -.- That'd suck. And if you got any ideas, I'd love to hear them.**

**Next time: What the heck does Genesis have in his closet!? Is that cat evil? And what is Zack doing all alone?**

**Now...review? Please? Sephiroth wants some more cake.**

**FF009**


	5. In Genesis' Closet

_I LIIIIIVE! __Damn, I'm way late again. I'm sorry. Don't think I hate this story. I love it to bits! It's just this has proven to be much more trickier to write than I originally thought. And I'm currently working on...-counts on her fingers- 3 other stories along with this. What's wrong with me?_

_Cloud: Your face._

_FF009: HEY THAT'S MEAN! Do the disclaimer or I'll give you a haircut. -hold scissors up-_

_Cloud: Faerie doesn't own Final Fantasy VII. Or me. Or my hair._

_FF009: Shut up, chocobo head. Like I'd want to own you._

* * *

**In Genesis' Closet**

* * *

"61...62...63...64..."

Zack sucked in air, doing a round of squats while he waited for Angeal and Sephiroth to come back with the LOVELESS Genesis had stocked in this apartment. The T.V. was on with the sound turned down low, showing some dark movie as he did his exercises. Genesis was quietly asleep on the couch beside him. For now...

With a grunt Zack stretched up to a stop and took a deep breath, wiping his forehead. He glanced over to Genesis, tip-toeing over to him with curious mako eyes. He leaned over more, seeing the slow rise and fall of the man's chest. He bit down on his tongue, picking up a stray pen on the table behind him, his heart racing as he aimed it above the warrior he prepared to poke. His wedged fingers let it go but quickly caught it again, a thought coing to him. Something better to do.

Pivoting around he dug through the clutter on the table, he grinned when he found a crimson wallet beneath a stack of letters from his fan girls (a rather thick set, noting how surprisingly heavy it was when he moved it aside). Flipping the sleek leather front open he extracted a shiny black Shinra credit card.

Zack muffled a mischevious laugh against the card until he heard Genesis' breathing cease its rhythm. A trickle of sweat slipped down his face. He slipped the credit card in his back pocket, jumping over the coffee table to duck behind to prepare for the worst. He stopped himself.

Genesis turned on his side as he sunk back into deep sleep, his arm almost falling off the cushions.

Zack exhaled, slouching against the table, grateful he wasn't caught. He slowly back stepped from Genesis, holding his hands out to him. He stopped at the doorway.

"Don't...move...?"

Zack narrowed his eyes, seeing no movement beyond the glow of the television screen.

"Good," he praised with a nod. "Good Genesis."

Not wasting another second he quickly walked out to find the phone. Zack whistled innocently, eyes darting from side to side as he plucked up the wireless phone in the kitchen, punching buttons swiftly before cradling it against his ear. After two rings a nasally, bored voice answered.

"Pizza delivery service, what would you like to order?"

* * *

Sephiroth's eye stopped twitching at last, now staring ahead at what laid beyond the closet he and Angeal just ventured in. He had to question how their friend was still clasified as sane and mentally healthy by the public. This was ridiculous. No wonder Genesis had been asking him for some money to borrow these past couple of weeks. He shouldn't have believed he was donating money to his fanclub.

Fanclub-s.

Fanclubs.

Sephiroth clenched his fist unconsciously.

Genesis must have slipped alcohol in his drink for him to give him money.

The First Class closed his cyan eyes, praying he wasn't here, and then opened his eyes. He was still here. This place was proof Genesis wasn't just "slightly obsessed."

Angeal shook his head, a tired, horrified gleam in his blue eyes.

"Please tell me I'm dreaming Sephiroth. Please tell me this isn't true," he begged in a rough tone. Sephiroth folded his arms, sighing as he felt a pounding in his temples come around.

"No, my friend, we are very much awake...and in Genesis' closet." Sephiroth frowned to himself, noting how strange that sounded aloud.

"Then we are going to send Genesis to therapy first thing tomorrow," Angeal answered readily, holding his forehead. Growling with impatience he usually never had he pointed out with his other hand. "This closet shouldn't even be this _big!!_"

The last word echoed out through the walls of this tiny place. Or not so tiny place.

This was not a typical closet. No—Somehow, Genesis had a place of worship for LOVELESS the size of a church in this "closet". Somehow the walls were completely covered in polished rosewood shelves fulls of books, all the way to the ceiling. There were lights wedged in the ceiling, spilling out soft illumination on this sancutuary. Far away at the end of this "closet" was a huge, dark red lounging chair complete with a matching plush foot rest and a side table modestly standing next to it.

Angeal ran his hand over his face, groaning. "It's so much like his library back home."

"What?"

"Back in Banora, his parents had a library built in their manor to keepsafe their collection of literature," Angeal explained, tearing his eyes away from the madness around them. Sephiroth bowed his head, impassive. "Whenever I came over to his house, I always found him there with a book in his hand and his mind far away."

"I now question his parents' way of rearing," Sephiroth mumbled to himself, fishing around for his Fire materia. He let out a soft curse when he discovered he only had equipped his mastered Ice, Transform and Barrier materia tonight.

"You have a Fire on you?" Sephiroth asked swiftly. Angeal shook his head.

"Only Ice, Thunder and Restore."

"Now what?" Sephiroth sighed in frustration, running a hand through his hair; he felt paranoid at being surround by so many books in this "closet". It was starting to get to his head.

His comrade shrugged, estimating how many novels were in this place with. Gaze roving to the left he stopped, catching Sephiroth's sly, glowing green eyes watching him expectedly.

Angeal felt a sliver of fear trickle down his spine when he started to walk up to him.

* * *

The phone laid discarded near the panty. Humming, Zack bounded toward the refridgerator with a gleeful grin. He popped the door open, unable to keep the smile off his face. Being a grunt in the army proved to be no luxury; you slept on a poor excuse for a bed and the meals certainly weren't home-cooked meals by your loving parents. Zack was in heaven right now.

He decided on an orange soda and swiped it out, gulping it down like a man lost in the desert. And then something meowed, and Zack was pretty sure it wasn't the sleeping SOLDIER.

Slowly he turned his head down to his right side, seeing green eyes within fluffy fur staring longingly up at him. He blinked, gulping the fizzing soda down as the cat started to purr, expecting milk.

"Um....no. No, no, no." Zack shook his head, pointing at the kitty. It kept purring, causing Zack to sigh. Setting down the soda Zack faced the feline and knelt in front of it, frowning severly. "NO. Bad kitty, go away."

Her whiskers twitched, as if not understanding.

"Look, kitty, you can't have pizza," he said, starting to educate the cat. "Cats don't eat pizza. Cats eat mice and fish and..." Zack trailed off when the feline rubbed her head on his leg, purring affectionately. The human facepalmed himself, groaning with annoyance.

He stilled suddenly, his ears picking up someone ringing the doorbell.

"Yes! Okay, _you_." He pointed down at the cat. "Stay..."

With one final glare Zack raced for the front door, Genesis' wallet in hand.

* * *

Bright blue mako eyes cracked open slowly, a moan uttered out as his vision adjusted to the dim lighting. A hand smacked into his hair, feeling an annoying bump. Genesis let out a curse, making a mental note to complain to Lazard tomorrow morning.

He got off whatever it was he was laying on, only to bump his knee into the coffee table. Another curse leaked out of his lips, cleary still in recovery mode from the alcohol and traumatic episode with Red Leather. Rubbing his back he walked for the doorway, wanting sink into sleep under his blankets. Right when he entered the hall a spiky haired boy ran into him, causing him to yelp in surprise.

"Damn it house, apartment get Angeal OUT!" Genesis exclaimed wildly, glaring at a very confused Zack with hazy eyes, not noticing Zack's arms holding a couple boxes of pizza.

"Um..." That was the easily the strangest threat Zack had received. "Are you alright, sir? You don't look so well," he said gently. "And, I'm Angeal's _student,_ Zack Fair..."

"And fangirls morning Lazard for some_ more_ talk, mm-kay?" Genesis continued in a drunk slur, walking down the hall with a friendly wave back to the supposed Angeal. The younger warrior stared at the man turn for his room...and smack into the wall.

"Sir, please let me help you!" Zack pleaded, setting his food on the kitchen table before running out to catch the First Class tripping backwards. Zack's knees bucked but he sucked in air, lifting the new and more drunk improved Genesis. Zack turned him to the open doorway to his bedroom.

"Go rest, sir," he urged, a cute sneeze echoing out when he took a step back. Genesis spun around, staring at the space to the left of where he was standing with great concern.

"Goddess bless you," Genesis said to it seriously before proceeding into his room. Zack blinked a few times, worry written all over his face.

Genesis swaggered across the floor, rubbing his head as he searched for his dresser. Stopping once he stared at a purring ball of fluff. Oh, wait, that was the cat a fangirl send to him as a gift. So he did the thing he did ninety percent of the time with it.

Ignore it.

The cat was sauntered away, sniffing around the closet door, which was now shut. He followed it with a sluggish march. He yawned, staggering to a stop. Then he went as still as a statue, his ears picking up voices beyond the closet. Which was weird.

Curious, he sauntered up like a half drunk. Slowly he lowered himself in a kneeling position until he tipped over. Genesis grunted and held his elbow, having hit his funny bone. Why was the floor hitting him all of a sudden tonight?

He slapped the ground once. Stupid floor.

Scooting over Genesis quieted down, a deep voice speaking out behind his closet door. A yawn came over him. Wiping his eyes he sat near the door...

Wait, what door was he leaning against again? Maybe his bathroom, unless he was in his room.

"...yeah, I'm ready. Hold it steady, man."

Sephiroth?

"Alright...don't miss, or it's going to hurt like hell for me," his old friend Angeal answered calmly. Genesis pressed his ear on the door, holding his breath in and then...

Rhythmic banging sounded within his closet.

"Sephiroth what are you—"

Bang bang bang. Genesis' jaw dropped, eyes dilating in shock as the noise continued.

"Sephiroth, stop...stop it!" Angeal cried out weakly, his patience thrown out the window.

More rapid banging.

"STOP, YOU'LL RUIN IT!"

"Oh sweet Goddess." Genesis held a hand over his mouth. This couldn't be happening.

One more bang, followed by loud, heavy breathing. "I will not, Angeal. Just hold still and this will work."

Bang bang bang!

"Sephiroth, this isn't working!" Angeal yelled in a winded voice. Genesis twitched a few times in disgust, wanting to flee but his body felt heavier than usual.

"Be quiet, it will!" Sephiroth ordered with a snap of black anger. The cat skidded back and dove under the bed, hissing at how louder the noise got. Genesis felt sick, holding his sweating forehead at what he was hearing. His poor mind, his poor, innocent, still-in-a-hangover mind. His friends...and in his closet!

Wait, this was his bathroom. Didn't he decide that earlier? Wait, his friends were in his bathroom of all places!

BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG—

"Oh my Goddess!" Genesis cried, clutching his racing heart.

BANG BANG—

"_OW!_" Angeal's voice abruptly howled in pain. Then a deafening thud was heard, the heavy breathing of the general still audible behind the door. Genesis had jumped back finally, staring the door with quickening, panicked breaths.

"See...no casualties, Angeal," Sephiroth soothed softly. Footsteps echoed out, an amused chortle of his silver haired friend filling the silence. Genesis gasped desperately, only for it to be cut off by a loud boom of a voice.

"LOOK AT ALL THIS BLOOD! DO I LOOK ALRIGHT?!" Angeal screeched in outrage, something in his tone indicating Sephiroth to look at him, who went completely quiet then.

"Oh...here, I'm sorry..."

Angeal snorted, mumbling something Genesis couldn't hear. Not like it mattered. The SOLDIER's body had collapsed backwards, falling unconscious once again at the horror he just heard.

* * *

**Yeah...that was...I wonder what everyone will think... **

**Just what was going on in his "closet"? Will Zack get fat from all that pizza? Will Genesis ever become sober?! Even I don't know XD**

**FF009**


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